Excuses, Excuses!

Hey Ladies,

Nice weather means people are ready to mingle! So enjoy this blog..it's just a little reminder in case you find yourself doing this. It's simple and to the point. 

THEORY: 
EXCUSES MAKE US FEEL GOOD ABOUT GIVING THEM ANOTHER CHANCE BUT EXCUSES ARE ALSO THE REASON YOU KEEP ENDING UP WITH THE SAME BAD/WASTE OF TIME RESULTS.

CHALLENGE: STOP IT.

Ladies, guys are already EXPERTS at making up excuses in order to get themselves out of "trouble" ..it's how they refuse to take any accountability for being jackasses...so trust me when I say, they don't need your help.

TRY THIS:
Guy acts like a D-bag. Listen to that woman intuition telling you his "reason/excuse" is bullshit. Then get your phone, delete his #, and make room for another dude's #. 

You don't even have to tell him why...just delete and move on. It doesn't have to be some dramatic telenovela ending. 

HAPPY DATING! :)

~Twin :)

End of the Year - End of Bad Habits

Hey Ladies,

I hope you enjoy this one and only 2013 post! :)

THEORY:
BAD HABITS DON'T DIE EASY BUT YOU CAN STILL KILL THEM!

CHALLENGE:
Start AND finish 2014 replacing bad dating habits with good ones. (Sounds hard, huh?)

You know what your bad habits are...your friends might even know what your bad habits are..but only you can kill them!

TRY THIS:

• Put 60 seconds on the clock and list all your 2013 BAD dating HABITS. 
• Now take another 60 seconds to list all your BAD EXCUSES for continuing those habits. 

Don't worry...what happened in 2013 STAYS in 2013! Really remind yourself of the hell some of those habits made you go through and sincerely pledge to STOP!!

Not ready? Fine. Take the last few hours we have left of 2013 and run through your bad habits again if you want (or after Mr. Jack Daniels negatively influences you later tonight) BUT come 2014 (and after the shitty feeling of regret inevitable hits) - then you're done! Time for happy habits, Happy New Year and HAPPY DANCES!!!

Click Here For Inspiration

**Si se puede people so don't immediately go break your pledge...give it at least a month of life! LOL**

~Twin :)

Take Care of You and Everything Else Will Fall Into Place

THEORY: 
TAKE CARE OF YOU AND THE REST WILL FALL INTO PLACE

CHALLENGE:
Stop stressing over things you can't control. Transfer that energy towards bettering YOU.

Ladies...I understand we have that urge...that curiosity to see what they are doing and who they are doing it with...but please, do yourself a favor and focus on something you can control...YOUR WELL BEING.

Can you control if they are hooking up with a hottie (or a FUGly for that matter)? No.
Can you control if you look like a hottie? YES.

Can you control if they are booming career-wise? No. (I know we want to do better than them lol)
Can you control if you are killing it at work? HELL YEAH.

Can you control if they are out and about meeting new people? No.
Can you control if you are out and about single-ling and mingle-ling? YES

Are you getting my drift? TAKE CARE OF YOU because he is and you SHOULD BE TOO. We are talking about you here...why wouldn't you take care of you first.

Trust me...once you put yourself first, they will notice. Everyone will...that includes YOU. Then you will either have them come back looking for you...AND/OR you will be filling yourself so much at that point whether they are or are not chasing you really wont phase you.

~Twin

"Si Se Pudo" vs "A Cuddle Buddy"

LADIES - Know Your Worth!

Living in DC, I have met some of the smartest, most accomplished ladies. I'm talking lawyers, doctors, business owners..you name it! YET, these same brilliant females are the same people I see excusing men and their stupidities because, "A career does not cuddle with you at the end of the day." 

Men are always going to be men. I get it. I also get that both our parents and ourselves have worked too hard to move up in life to let some D-bag treat us like seconds. I didn't come second to my parents so myself value, dignity and respect should NOT come second to ME. 

Cuddling with a warm body might feel amazing at the time but does cuddling with someone who only cuddles with you when "he feels like it" really feel more amazing than seeing your parents cry as you walk across the stage to receive your degree? Does it feel more amazing than knowing you passed the Bar? Does it feel more amazing than being a great role model to your family's next generation? Does it feel more amazing than being able to say, "Si Se PUDO!"...??

Moments of cuddling with a warm body is not worth the time, effort, emotional and mental hell. REFOCUS your energy into something and/or someone who is WORTH it. 

REMINDER - IF YOU DON'T PUT YOURSELF FIRST, NO ONE WILL.

The Modern Woman Needs A Modern Caveman

THEORY: The Modern Woman Needs A Modern Caveman.

CHALLENGE: Do not let your education and career be an excuse for a man not to be a gentleman.

Let’s compare where men were and where we expect them to be now, shall we?

Where men were: CAVEMAN

 “BAMM! BAMM!”

 “Me kill animal!”

 “Me hit you over the head with stick”

 “Me drag you by your weave”

 “Me rule you”

Where we expect them to be: MODERN CAVEMAN

 “Be MANLY (pound on your chest if you want), but always be respectful”

 “Pull my hair in bed, but give me kisses on the forehead afterwards”

 “Pay for dinner and I’ll put in the tip”   

 “Open my door and I’ll unlock yours”

 “Be a gentlemen but don’t expect ‘something’ at the end of the day”

 “Be a respectable Modern Caveman and I’ll be a domesticated business woman”

In today’s world, we need a Modern Caveman, not one that thinks that by “Equal Rights” we meant we wanted men to stop being gentlemen and make us pay on dates.

MODERN WOMAN

 “I’m going to college”

 “I’m working full-time”

 “I’m providing for myself”

 “I’m buying my own house”

 “I’m domesticated because I want to be, not because I have to be”

 “…and YES, I still expect you to pick me up, open the door, never walk ahead of me, pay for dinner and respect my morals.”

LADIES – Are you moving up in the world? Educated. Career booming. Looking Fab.

You have every right not be! You also have every right to be the best at work, while getting treated like the best by your boo. 

THEORY: No Means No, Ladies.

CHALLENGE: Accept That When He Says He Doesn’t Want To Be In A Relationship, He Does NOT Want To Be In A Relationship.

As grown women, we have to be able to understand that a man can love spending time with you but that does not mean he wants to have fun with only you.

EXCUSES WE COME UP WITH:

*  “If he came or has kept coming back, he must care about me.”

If he cared that much he wouldn’t keep leaving you in the first place.

*  “I know he wants to be with me, he just needs time.”

He doesn’t need anything. You need to accept the truth.

*  “I can’t help it, I’m weak!”

           Well, we’ve all been there but it doesn’t change that fact that he isn’t making you his GF. 
            As long as you know that, enjoy it. ;P

LISTEN TO HIM: 

• “I don’t want a relationship/commitment”
• “I have/had an emergency (then he disappears for a long time)”
• “I’m going through a lot with work/family/school/blah blah blah”
• “You’re awesome and you’re exactly what I need BUT…”
• “I like you but I’m not ready”
• “My last relationship…blah blah blah”

Either way, NO MEANS NO. Accept it. At this point ladies, we have to take the hint. He isn’t making you his wifey…not you or that other girl he is talking to/sleeping with (sorry, but 90% sure there is someone else).

At the end of the day you can only be your fabulous self then he has three SIMPLE choices:

1.     Love it. Value it. Snatches it up before another lucky man does.

2.     Isn’t really into it and eventually walks from it.

3.     Hits it and quits it….and continues to do so as long as you are okay with it.

But guess what ladies? He isn’t the only one with choices. 

1.     Keep hoping, keep chasing, keep wasting time and energy – for nothing.

2.     Accept it. Know your worth. Move on. Maintain your swag (always). 

Challenge: Let Them Go The EXTRA Mile

Theory: Let Them Go The Extra Mile, They'll Do It!
             If they don't, then they're just not that into you..so say bye!

Ladies, we all want that guy that goes the extra mile for us, right?

So why do we keep those that don't around? "Because there isn't much to chose from," you say?

Probably true.. but it's still no excuse!

How to Enable bad habits/PREVENT them from going the extra mile:

• EASY - By YOU always being the one accommodating to his situation and schedule!

Be considerate but don't bend over backwards.
(Ladies wear dresses. If we bendover backwards, we show our undies. Not very lady like, is it!? So don't do it!)

If his situation/schedule is making it hard for yall to talk/hang, then let HIM figure out how to make it work. (HIM - as in NOT YOU)

If there is a problem, let a man take charge - plan - GO THE EXTRA MILE.

CHALLENGE: To Let HIM Go The Extra Mile!